Alright well I've gone from touching myself once a day to once every two days (depending sometimes a week and nothing) to basically working myself to an orgasm at least once a day......heh. *bluhes*. If a woman hits her sexual peak in her 30's like fuck what's that going to be like? Holy crap. Anyways. I was just thinking about sex....well that's pretty much slowly becoming all I think about....heh......but I was thinking.......I really just want to screw around alot this summer. Go crazy. I don't know why. I'm 18 I have to assume responsibilty and become an adult and take care of myself soon soooo I might as well spend my last little while as a teenager having the time of my life right? Meh, I dunno. I guess that just means going to a lot of parties, getting really drunk, doing drugs.....doing sexual favors FOR drugs lol. Uuuummmm, thats it on update of my life. Well there's a lot more but not really relevant in this journal haha. Oh my. Hhhhmmmm. Maybe I should write about what I've been dreaming/craving lately. heh. Well, there is that boy........I keep fantasizing that he'll just show up at my door and tell me to come with him and we get in the car, he takes me to this deserted alley and fucks me as hard and as gruesome as he can. Just POUND me into the wall......pull my hair, bit my neck, lips, tits, pinch my ass and make me suck his cock. Forcing me down on my knees and pulling my hair back telling me to be a good little girl and suck him......heh. Well I gotta run about tonight and party it up....rawr. Sex Drugs and Rock n Roll baby!

Masturbation survey
Are you male or female? Female

How old are you? 18

At what age did you start masturbating? hhmmm, summer after grade 5, but I didn't know what I Was doing...it was kinda by accident lol.

How many times a week do you masturbate? depends on the week, my mood, and my schedule

Where do you masturbate:
In bed? not really
In the shower? that's where it happens most
In the bath? sometimes
At the computer? occasionally
Outdoors? Nope
At work? hell no
Every room in the house? nope

What do you fantasize about when you play:
A significant other? Don't have one
A stranger? hellz yeah
A classmate? Not really
A co-worker? Nope
A relative? No
A friend? more like aquaintance becoming a friend that I think about
A member of the same sex? not really

How do you position do you play in:
On your back? when I rarely do it in bed
On your tummy? sometimes in bed
Sitting? sometimes when I sit on the shower floor
Standing? most of the time
Kneeling? Rarely
On all fours? sometimes

What porn do you use to masturbate:
Written erotica? YES
Pictures? hellz yea
Movie clips online? not really
Videos? not really
Something on TV? nope

What is your favourite porn:
Straight sex between man and woman? definatly
Gay or lesbian sex? meh
Group sex or orgies? sometimes
Blowjobs/oral sex? sure
Cumshots? allright
Anal? not really
Interracial? same as any other kinda porn to me, a person's colour is irrelevant
Incest? no, it scares me
S&M? heeeellllllz yeah bitches!
Roleplaying? for sure
Kinky? haha, hellz yeah


Have you ever masturbated to:
Email messages? Yes
In chat? All the time
exchanged stories or pictures? My computer is fucked and pictures are usually impossible, but I hoe to fix that soon

Have you ever:
Been caught masturbating? nope
Masturbated for a man/woman? yes, guy
Masturbated for the same sex? No
Masturbated in a group? no
Masturbated for a family member/relative? fuck no
Masturbated for a photo? no
Masturbated for a webcam? nope
Masturbated for a video? nope

Do you ever:
Play with nipples/breasts when masturbating? Yeah, they're pierced so they're really sensitive :)
Insert something or play with your ass? no
Insert something in mouth when masturbating? nah
Use pain as a method of playing? yeah......a lot :)

For women:
Do you insert something in your pussy when you play:
Fingers? yup
Dildo? nope
Vibe? nope
Beads/eggs? nope
Candle/brush household item? yup

For women:

For women:
Do you shave your pussy? yup. definatly

If so, do you completely shave it smooth or trim? smooth

For men and women:
Do you taste your cum? naw, but if a guy had eaten me out and he kissed me after I don't object

When was the last time you masturbated? yesterday morning

Describe what you were doing when you played last: I was in the shower thinking about some strong sexy guy bursting in and taking me any way he wanted.

Are you wet or hard now? gettin pretty wetl

Are you going to masturbate now? probably later.....gotta get myself riled up first :P

don't know I did that but I did. Lol, I'm quite boring haha. Too busy for too much self pleasure. Oh well that's what boys are for right?

Soooo fucking horny right now.....like holy fucking crap. I've been talking to this really cute guy lately....so all I can think about is him fucking me....I just want him to press me up against his dresser and fuck me as hard as he can. I want him to grab my hair as hard as he can, yank my head back and kiss me. I want him to grab my face and force my lips around his cock, deep into my throat so I'm almost choking. I want him to pour vodka over my stomach and tits and lick it off. I want him to cum all over my stomach, tits, and face. I want him to hold my hands and wrists together forcefull over my head and fuck me. Lie on top of me so I can feeel the weight of his body and heat. I want us to fall asleep with him holding really tight so I can't get away. I want him to wake up and jack off loudly so I wake up and I could give him head. He'd get mad that I would be doing something without him telling me I'm aloud to so he'd grab me and take me in the shower. He'd hold me up against the cold tile and slap me for interupting his masturbation. He didn't get to cum yet. He'd bite at my neck, scratch at my back and growl as his body enveloped mine. He'd turn on the shower and fuck me until I couldn't stand. He'd fuck me so hard that I have tears in my eyes and I'm begging him not to stop. He'd take me back to the bed and kiss me all over and we'd fall asleep wet and tired. And definatly, when he woke uup....he'd be asking for a blow job........he'd grab my hair and forced my mouth up and down on him. O gawd. He's so much stronger than I am, so he can control me in public and people wouldn't know. Just a slight grab of the arm and I can feel his strength and I'm immediatly his.

I'm so sick sometimes. Holy crap, I swear all I think about is sex. It's sad really. I just recently kinda figured out that I'm into rape fantasy. Just the thought of a guy taking me whenever wherever he wants to just sounds so hot. And I"m kind of into pain....sooo. Well not kinda, I am. I also like humiliation and being treated like property. i also love it when a guy reminds me how dirty I am and tells me I'm HIS. And recently.....I dunno why. I'm hesitant to say this because it is a little dirty....well a lot dirty......I really like the idea of a guy pissing on me. Just the humiliation of it. The fact that he can do whatever he wants to me, and the fact that he's like 'marking his territory' really turns me on.

blah, well that's it for now.

I have been away for a looonnng while....things have been shitty but that's alright I'm getting things together now and life is starting to go my way......for now. I make a few mistakes now and then but hey as long as my goals are reached I'm fine right? Rawr. Haven't been on the computer in the past few months or little while or w/e, just to keep things uncomplicated....shit happened and things got fucked up...haha. Anyways I don't really know what to say......I've been running a lot lately which is awesome, and I've been starting physio/pilates and I'm starting yoga soon as well....wow this is on top of working and school ouch. It's pretty much awesome though.....uummm, lemme see now. What else do I want to touch on........I always said that I would write some erotic fiction didn't I? HHhhhmmm, maybe I should finally get around to that, there's always things I want to do to explore my quite wild and sexual side but I'm always busy either working, working out, out with friends, school, more friends, shows etc. Haha, o dear....I guess I just need to find myself a local bad boy who's willing to rough me up a little. Uuuummm, I got my nipples peirced :). Hehe, i love them so much. They're hoops with balls....I really want to get some barbells with balls sooon....rawr but they're so damn expensive and fuck there's a lot to pay for when your a student, driving etc. Blah. I got a car. It made me smile....it made me smile loads actually. haha, it's a green convertable...it's old, used, and I had to fix it up but still it's pretty amazing haha. I can't wait until the weather gets really warm and I can drive around with top down, music cranked up....haha it will be awesome.

ok, so thing that recently made me go "wow" was looking back on the movie Queen of the Damned (ok booook but I was specifically thinking about the movie) where he takes girls after the shows to his house....well he sucks they're blood and kills them, unfortunatly I don't really feel like dying, however I find it really sexy the fact that he is sending someone out to fetch girls for him. Like imagine going to some obscure concert and being pulled aside and told that you get to go backstage and meet one of the bands.....and you get back there and there's a man standing there in ripped leather jeans, messy brown hair and aviators on covered in fucking tattoos smoking a cigarette. I'd cream my pants right there. Holy fuck. Then he tells his 'fetch boy' to leave and he seems a little angry....he then grabs you by the face and whispers dirty angry seksi words in your ear and slips his hands down the front of your jeans.....your all nervous and don't know what to do, you want to stay stop and slap him and get the fuck out but it feels so good and he's definatly got a good grip on you. He'd fuck you so hard, up against the wall deep and fast......he'd make you give him head pulling at your hair wanting more.......he'd do line of coke off your stomach and then inch his lips down to lick your pussy......he'd take a sip of his beer and kiss your lips letting some of the it seep into your mouth.....dribble it down your body so you smell like sex and alcohol......he'd also light his cigarette and drag the hot lighter along your skin watching it turn red......sucking on his cigarette and blowing the warm smoke down your body, and some into your mouth. He'd bite deep long marks down your ribs and suck hard on yur nipples. It would be amazing. You'd fall asleep/ pass out (come on drugs and alcohol haha) and he'd be half lying on top of you, warm as hell keeping himself wrapped around your body because he's not done yet. The rest of the band would walk by and throw his leather jacket at you two telling you guys toget a room, he'd yell at his friends and grab hold of you more posessivly because he needs to indicate that you're his and they're not to touch. Later on you'd migrate groggily to the bus where he'd fuck you again in the back lounge while his friends play video games......you'd wake up the next morning alone on the bus with a note scrawled in black eyeliner "don't leave". You'll wait of course.....stilll stinking of smoke, sex and alcohol. And he won't discard you like the others.....you were a little fiestier maybe, a little more submissive mabye, or possibly even just all around a better fuck then the rest of those sluts. So while he may change it up every now and then, just to keep you interested (jelousy works wonders) you always know you'll get yours in the end and it will be rough, hard, fast full of sex drugs and rock n roll........I love that....just that idea. I find it really hott. I dunno why, I have an obsession with music so maybe that's it. Rawr. well that's it really.
fucks and kisses

well, I figured it was time to update. I spent pretty much most of the night chatting online :P.....then got up, worked out and had a shower.....fuck I was horny. I had been looking at fucking oversized cock porn all morning so when I got in the shower I was like going nuts. The only problem is that my shower is "under construction" right now so I have to use the sucky shower that like has water just dribbling out of it. *sigh*. So, in my time of need I layed down on the shower floor (not very comfy may I add, legs up against the wall) and let the pathetic shower of water poor on top of my pussy. It took a while....but eventually I had a pitiful orgasm and now am sadly, horny again. I think I'll go and look at some hardcore porn maybe end up starting to write a story in here.......play with myself a little and then go party with my friends tonight. Hellz yeah with crack. Uuuummm, fuck I need a cigarette.

I have a few things on my mind. One, I think I'm going to start doing some dirty cartoons. Two, I want to put out a request to anyone who reads this to write me a naughty comment or if I have given you my email a naughty, dirty, nasty, email, hehe. I'm also seriously thinking about getting a job at one of those bondage photo things?!?!?! I dunno. I just think it would be really hot. But again. Email me. Don't worry about what I would like, just write something really dirty and nasty....anything you fantasize about......write it down and send it over. And you'll be happy to know that I'll being fucking myself all night when I get home if anyone has complied. hehe. UUuuuuum, I think I might go work on a dirty storry I'm not sure. I'm so fucking horny lately it's intense. I need a pimp, haha. But seriously....fuuuuck.

Hey, whoever finds themselves on this page. Thanks for visiting. Don't really have much to say at the moment...looking for people to chat to I guess, but don't we all really want to find someone to talk to? I'm a pretty submissive chick when it comes to sex, however, in everyday life I'm independant and like to be in control. I'm thinking about starting to write some erotica, I think that would be hot, I don't really have time tonight because I have a shitload of work to do and I haven't started. Shit. Well that's it I guess, the page WILL get more interesting I promise, I'm just too lazy to decorate it right now, and too busy.
Fucks and Kisses